Over the weekend I experienced some intensely painful feelings and flashbacks concerning my very early childhood and involving my mother. I am having to face the very real possiblilty that my mother may have hit me as a toddler. Sigh. There is no way to know for sure at this point and I don't know that I even want or need to know for certain. My work, as given to me by a loving Heavenly Father through blessings and inspiration, is to work on processing my own pain, so that I can heal and assist Him in cleansing this branch of Israel. As a mother, I am to become ever more like my Savior, so that the line may flow clear and pure through my posterity, for generations to come. This is difficult, unseen, painful work. It is as though I am digging a well, in the desert, so that my children may live and blosom as the rose. When I am bruised, battered, weary, worn and cannot move another muscle, my Savior steps in, binds up my wounds, lets me rest a spell, and does so much work for me. How I love Him. "He knows I will follow Him, give all my life to Him."
Thank you again for your loving prayers and support. - Susie
2 comments:
Those are some powerful feelings to have to work thru, and I know you can do it! Sometimes the things we need to do are so painful, but the hope is there that it will be a blessing for many generations - I hope you have had some rest and peace my friend!! Love you!!!!
(PS - I didn't get it worded right the first time... Sorry!) :)
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